One characteristic that has been constantly said whenever sharing functions of the ideal coming connection was an effective “husband” who was simply economically stable. Females conveyed additional viewpoints about what it experienced it meant to feel financially steady. Certain women talked about its spouse since the best vendor into family unit members while some described their mate since the causing your family cash. More than once, lady stated that they wanted partners just who you will “provide for all of us.” Girls just weren’t certain towards sorts of job or occupation you to the top companion will have, but have been specific the occupations ought to provide “enough to shell out their bills or what they you prefer in daily life.” Another new member revealed their better companion a someone that “…are unable to are obligated to pay we currency and you’re playing with my personal money to spend her or him right back; zero you have to be financially secure, have a great home, a good business, a significant occupations…” Female including chatted about its companion being independent and never in need of to help you rely on them to possess some thing. Which quote captures these attitude: “I would personally would like them to be a success, such as somebody who can feel separate, type of. They might stand-on their a couple foot easily was not doing.”
Purpose centered
During the extra so you can getting financially steady, people wished a future mate who had been “goal-centered.” Although they didn’t offer certain details on what these types of goals would be, ladies conformed you to their top partner create “must be motivated to make a move the help of its life. They cannot lay on your butt for the remainder of their lifestyle and you can carry out little. That is https://datingmentor.org/moroccan-dating/ a huge situation.” Another lady explained they by doing this, “If i have my life together and you also don’t, you must go, … I recently require anyone who has their life along with her, who knows what they need, what they are carrying out … you just have to have your direct right; you must have good head on your arms.” As various other analogy, you to woman demonstrated the next companion in these terminology: “You gotta provides prospective, you gotta currently have one thing going on that have yourself as if I have things happening that have me, I’m not planning to communicate with some one which is undertaking anything smaller. So that you currently have for one thing opting for on your own one will in actuality create myself now have an explanation to even speak for your requirements.”
Talk
Lady provided considerate and expressive comments about their relationships viewpoints. When considering the opportunity to discuss their dreams and you can wants to possess current and you can upcoming matchmaking, people offered positive depictions regarding relationship and you can relationships having the ideal lover. It depiction can be a bit compared with much existing browse and therefore too frequently illustrates Ebony females as prone to your chance engagement and unhealthy practices (Sullivan, Childs, & O’Connell, 2010). Suggestions gleaned from the interview in manners dispels the idea that every Ebony people are not aware match matchmaking services (Raiford ainsi que al., 2007). Female inside try discussed their most readily useful relationship playing with terminology one to depict self-confident thinking off adolescent most recent and upcoming dating.
Best Relationship Matchmaking when you look at the Twelfth grade
Similarities and you may differences was indeed both evident regarding African american girls’ narratives about a fantastic matchmaking relationships, now and also in the future. Numerous themes came up off their breakdown of one’s best dating throughout the highschool: (1) temporariness of senior school relationship, (2) with a partner just who shared equivalent degree and you can profession agreements, and you will (3) requirement for family members into the identifying a fantastic dating. More layouts came up in their breakdown of the ideal upcoming relationship: (1) fascination with marriage, (2) economic stability, and (3) requirements centered. Likewise, in both the characterization of your own greatest matchmaking during the senior school and also in the future, girl chatted about a desire for ‘top friend’ services such as regard, believe, and you will sincerity. It’s encouraging to know you to teenage Ebony lady set really worth within these characteristics and actively seek them inside their close dating.
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